messy – The Saucy Mama

I used to like cleaning. My bedroom was always neat and tidy as a kid. I folded and put my clothes away immediately. I dusted my dresser, my CDs, and my stereo. I ran the vacuum cleaner. I liked my space in order.

On Sundays, I would do my chores, dust the living room, and take turns with my older brother to clean the bathroom we shared. Even as I went through college, and moved into my own apartment, I reserved Sundays for major cleaning.

Now cleaning is the bane of my existence. It’s become an every day necessity that never brings the same satisfaction that it used to. Before I could clean a room, walk out of it and come back an hour later and every thing would be exactly as I left it. Now, though, I know that as soon as I turn my back the beautiful little creatures that I carried and squeezed out of my body will have dumped over a bucket of recently collected toys to create a new mess.

Sometimes, they truly suck.

I love my kids, but my house hasn’t been spotless in five years. I know it’s a little cold-hearted to blame a newborn for making a mess. They can’t control whether or not they pee as soon as the diaper comes down. Both my boys were “happy spitters” so that meant a lot of spit up covers burp clothes, bibs, onesies, and shirts.

As they get older, the toys — and their corresponding parts — get smaller and the mess gets bigger.

There are days when I’m so over picking things up, I don’t. Some days, I’ll walk by the playroom or our living room and I avert my eyes and keep it moving. Because sometimes I get to the point where if I pick up the same dinosaur or Paw Patrol pup again, I will throw it away. And if I start throwing things away, they won’t have any toys left.

Instead, I let the mess go until I can’t anymore (i.e. when people are coming over in the case of this weekend). Then I scrub, reorganize and do my best to keep the place tidy until the company arrives. After that, I give up on any pretense that my house is always neat and orderly. I sigh and mentally prepare myself for the major clean up that will happen after everyone leaves.

I write this on the cusp of having fifty people in my house for a birthday party on Saturday. Thankfully, my mother will be hosting Easter this year. Who said small miracles don’t exist?

What is it with kids and water? Something so simple can provide hours of entertainment…and this BEFORE they discover 20-foot high water slides.

Last night as I was working on my laptop and my husband was sitting in the office with me on his phone, we heard the water running. Then it stopped. Then little feet ran down the hallway. Then back. Then water. Then back. I think this happened about five times before hubby said, “What are they doing?” I replied, “I don’t know. I’m working. Why don’t you go check.”

Next thing I know, he’s back at the office door saying, “You’re the one who wanted them to have the toy kitchen; you get to clean this one up.” I rolled my eyes and went to the playroom. Our little cherubs took it upon themselves to fill the sink in their play kitchen with water. It took about fifteen minutes, a Tupperware container, and a turkey baster to get the mess sorted.

Then this evening, just to keep things spicy…J grabbed a large bottle of Italian seasoning and spread it ALL OVER the house. I must have left it on the lower counter, and he grabbed it while my back was turned. I didn’t realize he’d done it until I walked down the hall to collect C for dinner, and I couldn’t escape the scent of oregano. I tossed the toy room looking for the bottle. Then I notice piles going down the hallway and into the living room. J was hiding behind the couch with the empty bottle and a container of watermelon. Not really sure what kind of scenario required him to empty a completely full 6.25 oz bottle of seasoning.

I spent all tubby time vacuuming the playroom, the hallway, and the living room. You might or might not be surprised to hear that most of the bottle ended up between the center cushions of our couch that cover the pull-out.

Sometimes I wonder if they choose when to be ninjas and when to channel to elephant march from The Jungle Book. Yesterday, we heard the running water, the footsteps, and the giggles. This evening I heard NOTHING. I wasn’t playing a podcast or music as I often do most evenings. I was just focused on not burning the house down.🤷‍♀️

I’ve learned my lesson on vigilance. I must always be on at all times. Even when I’m trying to complete a simple task such as dinner.

Good God, no wonder I’m so tired all the time!

Tag: messy

Clean and Clean, then Clean Some More

Loud is Trouble; Quiet is Trouble