So…two of my resolutions are already out the window. I know it’s still January 1st, but I’ve already given up. Don’t judge me! Here’s what happened…
Resolution #1: Make healthier dietary choices.
After an early morning of cuddles and being climbed all over, because let’s be real, there is no sleeping in with toddlers. J declared that he was hungry and wanted pancakes. We all made our way to the kitchen. While hubby made eggs for C, I pulled out the pancake mix and a bowl. J wanted to help, so I scooped out a cup of mix, brought the bowl to his level, and handed him the measuring cup. He neatly dropped it in the bowl. We repeated the step with the water and mixing. Then I asked if he wanted chocolate chips in them, and of course, he said yes. He’s a toddler; there was no chance the answer was going to be no.
With the batter mixed, we heat and butter the pan. He adds the batter — when I can, I let the boys cook; I’m raising them to be self-sufficient — and we wait for the pancakes to reach the appropriate flipping doneness. Once they were ready, he had two yummy chocolate chip pancakes. There was enough better for two more pancakes…and there went my first resolution.
I know what you might be thinking, “Two chocolate chip pancakes to celebrate the start of the new year isn’t so bad” or “You still had better left, you were trying no to be wasteful.” Reader, you would be right on both accounts. And it would have been fine had I stopped there. After breakfast, hubby ran to Home Depot to grab hooks we need for a basement organization project. I put The Grinch on for the kids, because they are still feeling the Christmas spirit — C asked to see Santa today — and went to my bedroom to fold laundry and watch The Woman King. Clearly, I’m done with Christmas. I got about two minutes in before the kids came running in for help with turning on the giant piano mat my youngest brother got them for Christmas. Fun fact, FAO Schwarz makes toys; I thought it was a dead brand. The more you know.🤷🏽♀️
The interruptions kept coming, and I kept pausing the movie. Then J pooped, and we got into a fight while I tried to clean his bum because he REFUSED to stay still. By the time we finished, I needed chocolate. He chased me down the hall crying as I went to toss the diaper and go down to the basement to pull chicken from the freezer. I closed the door behind me so he couldn’t follow. It may sound like I was overreacting to my kid wanting me, but this is also the kid that woke me up and tried to drag me out of bed at 6 AM to turn on Spidey and his Amazing Friends in the playroom.
Hubby came back as I went downstairs, so he picked up a crying J and gave him a hug. On my way back to my bedroom to restart my movie — which I found out hubby turned off in favor of the Patriots game — I grabbed two Lindt milk chocolate balls only for C to catch me in the act of eating the first one and subsequently start cry when I pop the second one in my mouth. I know, I’m an asshole.
J soon realized that I had chocolate, slid out of his father’s lap and declare that he wanted chocolate too. I told the boys if they gave each other a hug — since I’d managed to upset them both AND I’m trying to teach them to lean on each other during the tough time — they’d each get a chocolate. They did. They both got a chocolate ball, I gave one to hubby and ate two more myself. SEE resolution is all shot to hell!
Resolution #2: Yell less; give “gentle parenting” a fighting chance.
My boys are not built for gentle parenting. I’m not built for gentle parenting. That’s not true. I’m not built for sustained gentle parenting.
J — today really wasn’t a good day for he and I — declared he wanted a cookie while we were watching the Pats game — I wasn’t super upset that my movie had been turned off; I love the Pats, they’ve just broken my heart a lot this season. I said, we don’t have any cookies. A few minutes later my very capable 2.5 year old came back with a Tupperware container of leftover cookies from holiday baking we’d done that I’d completely forgotten about. I had a cookie, C grabbed a cookie, J took two cookies.
Halftime hits and hubby heads to the basement to organization project started. I’m lying in the middle of our bed and J is behind me. I get up to head to the bathroom only to turn around and see that J has DECIMATED a gingerbread cookie on our bed. He ground it into a FINE dust of gingerbready goodness. I let out a frustrated scream, kicked him off the bed, and grabbed the dustbuster. I also had to tell him to take off his pants because they were covered with gingerbread dust.
This was not a gentle parenting moment. There were no calm words. There was only “why did you just do that?”, “get off the bed and take of your pants!”, “don’t come back up here!” yelling moments. I commend parents who are fully committed to gentle parenting and make it work for them. I have toddlers who talk back and give me evil laughs when they do something wrong.
I’m starting to think that they find my emotional outbursts funny, though. This morning C kept playing with the Santa salt and pepper shakers that I haven’t decommissioned yet. I told him sternly but calmly — before I gave up on gentle parenting — to put them back and leave them alone. He said, “Are you mad?” I replied, “No, but I would like you to listen when I tell you to do something.” He asked me if I was mad twice more, then I gave in and made an angry face, which got an uproarious chuckle from him.
I give up. I’m just going to sit in a corner and eat chocolate for the rest of the year. Catch y’all in 2024 when I start from scratch again if diabetes doesn’t set in and remove me from this mortal coil!
Happy New Year!!🎊 May you have better luck with your resolutions than I did.😳
The Saucy Mama 